“Managing a Client’s expectations and advising them on a course of action turned out to be far more difficult than negotiating with the other Party.” So wrote newly-minted Indian lawyer Varsha Manoj about her experiences negotiating with her clients. Many lawyers in the US and other countries undoubtedly have similar experiences. Legal clients often experience…

“We’ve come a long way since we last shook hands Still got a long way to go” “Come a Long Way”, Kate McGarrigle & Louden Wainwright III performed by Kate & Anna McGarrigle and others (including Kate and Louden’s children, Martha and Rufus Towards the end of last year, we took our 13-year-old granddaughter and…

For readers who are new, the “Neuro-Linguist’s Toolbox” series is an ongoing series focused on using Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) in our practice of amicable dispute resolution. The first section focused on rapport (the first of which can be found here). The second section focuses on matters of self-care and personal improvement for mediators (the first…

“Half moons ago people were hollowed-out tablets of stone spaces were given them according to spaces they left . . . some spaces were filled with darkness no light would shine there . . .” – From “Afkasi” by Dr Selina Tusitala Marsh, former poet laureate of New Zealand Many of you will be familiar…

In theory, we expect the parties’ opening statements to be swift, persuasive and forceful. At least, this is what I teach my students in ADR classes. In my mediation room, sadly, this occurs rather sporadically. The communication at the table is, unfortunately, not faultless. I guess every mediator has witnessed long, ambiguous monologue instead of…

What mediators do with words

‘The world is made, not found’ (W. Barnett Pearce) (1) I just spent an intensive weekend on Zoom with my students, helping them navigate their early steps into mediation practice. So much has changed. I have never met most of them face to face; we sit at home on our screens; there are no coffee…

I blogged recently on the importance in mediation of not forgetting what is happening in the other room. It’s an easy mistake to make. Here’s another one that is easy to make. “Assumed motivation”. A lot of stuff happens both in conflicts and the process of their resolution. Things are said and done by each…

According to the Chinese Lunar calendar, yesterday (1 October 2020) was the Mid-Autumn Festival, commonly known as the Moon Festival in the West. With more Chinese living in different parts of the world, the Moon Festival has been receiving more attention, and gradually, it is becoming a popular festival everywhere as we all like to…

For this blogpost I interviewed Lin Adrian, associate professor of mediation and director of the master’s in Mediation and Conflict Resolution at the University of Copenhagen, Denmark. Together with the master’s in Mediation and Conflict Management at the Viadrina European University in Frankfurt / Oder Germany, Lin conducted an empirical study on the effects of mediation…

Those who have practised theatre may have heard of Constantin Stanislavski’s “An Actor Prepares” – a book on acting published in 1936. The book is popular in Hong Kong not only among those in the performing art but also fans of the Asia famous Hong Kong comedian,  Stephen Chow, who posed to be reading the…