In theory, we expect the parties’ opening statements to be swift, persuasive and forceful. At least, this is what I teach my students in ADR classes. In my mediation room, sadly, this occurs rather sporadically. The communication at the table is, unfortunately, not faultless. I guess every mediator has witnessed long, ambiguous monologue instead of…

What mediators do with words

‘The world is made, not found’ (W. Barnett Pearce) (1) I just spent an intensive weekend on Zoom with my students, helping them navigate their early steps into mediation practice. So much has changed. I have never met most of them face to face; we sit at home on our screens; there are no coffee…

I blogged recently on the importance in mediation of not forgetting what is happening in the other room. It’s an easy mistake to make. Here’s another one that is easy to make. “Assumed motivation”. A lot of stuff happens both in conflicts and the process of their resolution. Things are said and done by each…

According to the Chinese Lunar calendar, yesterday (1 October 2020) was the Mid-Autumn Festival, commonly known as the Moon Festival in the West. With more Chinese living in different parts of the world, the Moon Festival has been receiving more attention, and gradually, it is becoming a popular festival everywhere as we all like to…

For this blogpost I interviewed Lin Adrian, associate professor of mediation and director of the master’s in Mediation and Conflict Resolution at the University of Copenhagen, Denmark. Together with the master’s in Mediation and Conflict Management at the Viadrina European University in Frankfurt / Oder Germany, Lin conducted an empirical study on the effects of mediation…

Those who have practised theatre may have heard of Constantin Stanislavski’s “An Actor Prepares” – a book on acting published in 1936. The book is popular in Hong Kong not only among those in the performing art but also fans of the Asia famous Hong Kong comedian,  Stephen Chow, who posed to be reading the…

Going online is an opportunity to rethink old ways and try out new ones. For mediators, trainers, coaches, and teachers. Professionally the crisis can be an opportunity. While of course also a threat, with loss of business and income in many sectors, including mediation, facilitation and coaching. The competition for work may become tougher. This…

For readers who are new, the “Neuro-Linguist’s Toolbox” series is an ongoing series focused on using Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) in our practice of amicable dispute resolution. The first section (with 6 entries) focused on rapport (the first of which can be found here). This second section focuses on matters of self-care and personal improvement for…

Online courses have been around on the internet for decades now. You can learn almost everything you want online, and multiple online learning platforms such as Udemy, Skillshare, Coggno, or Skillwise give you an infinite choice of courses that you can take from the comfort of your home, when you want, and at your own…

Forced into quarantine due to COVID-19, thousands of miles away from home; I have struggled with silence, but eventually made peace with it, thanks to my Jesuit upbringing. Over a decade ago, as a Jesuit novice, I ventured on a reflective journey called the ‘Spiritual Exercises’ – a month-long retreat that is the hallmark of…